ERMMM.... ZEROZEROOMIND...

ASSALAMMUALAIKUM...  hi there.. i really miss u so much. haha.. firstly i realy dont want any one to read this... such a bull shit u know.! haha..wokey.. now i understand for make any of changes in our life was so hard... i can even imaged this all will be this hard...ottokey???  nan chongmal busoo.. scary of the world...  somethimmes it make me feel that world is so cruel... the person in this world was realy scary... but atcually i realy want to change but it seems so difficult...  how must i do now? inthe same time.. i also worry so much ... my mind like want to explode.. pushhhh. pang pang pang.....  hahai dont know what must i do now... i realy confius now..  it seems like i will had a realy hard time in next sem.. YA ALLAH.... apa patut hamba mu ini lakukan... aku betul2 dah butuh sgt...i become weak and more weaker.....  what must i do??? chongmal molla....! i feel like want to cry.. but i cant i must get stronger.. but how......???? i dont know what to do....  but while i just sitting and keep on thinking what to do, that so much more problem and things show up infront of me.....  i was realy shocked.... YA ALLAH give me more strength  n power to  solve this all... give me the right way to go for my life...... mybe this all was my fault.... i know but..... im try so hard to change but... u know evrythings right Allah? im a ordinary human that always make up the problem n alwys do the wrong things...  right now i feel like really want somone to motivate me n stay beside me n hold my hand tightly.... but... theres  no one i can see... not everythings we can let our parent know... its bcuz.... u will know when it happen towards u...   but u know.. when its come to the parents story..... i really want to say that i realy love them all...  u know there is somethings that our mom n dad can read our face,... hahha..... but  that make them all really understanding person.... makk... u was too awesome for me... for me... u can read my feeling... whenever it comes to angry, sad, happy, dispointed or whar ever it is u can know me...  i really love u mak.. i cant even think my life without u even one second....    bcuz that i try hard to live this life... just for u...  u are my motivated... u alwys there when i feel down maaa.... that really make me feel i dont need anyone else axcept u maaa...... im sorry for being a lazy kids, im not a smart child mom but i will try hard to become a usefull child for u that alwys take care of u n make u happy n secure wit me...  for my daddy... i love u... i realy manja with u ryte...  o SUBAHANALLAH.... i cant even say anythings bcuz i just so so so  greatfully sangat sangat to Allah to had a parent like ur.....  that all really make me feel that im not a good kid for ur...  I really hope u will live much more longer in a healty  body.... in this world for me  ilove my family and second is my friends....  these two a really important to me in my life now.....  ok  bye.. see u nest time... i want to sleepppp.. hwa hwa...